You know, I have no idea where motivation comes from or where mine goes from time to time. Sometimes, I get these phenomenal ideas, and I throw a lot of energy and time into collecting information (patterns, pictures, etc.) and resources or supplies to create this "Thing", whatever it is, and then, BOOM! No more motivation. So, I will set those items and my "Do It" list associated with that project to the side with some sketches of what I wanted to accomplish. Or maybe it's a project that will take lots and lots of small parts to create a whole. I will get so pumped and really put a lot into getting all the parts made, and once I am done, BOOM! No more motivation. Suddenly, I have yet another bag of crochet motifs that are stored for whenever my motivation for the project might .resurface
Finishing what I start has never been my strength. I was never forced to finish what I started when I was young, so I never found the value in it until I was an adult. Now, I always admire those who stay the course from start to finish. Those who had a plan and saw it all the way through. On the other hand, however, I have also accepted the fact that I am definitely a carefree individual. I just have to do what makes me happy, even if that changes from moment to moment. I am just not the kind of girl who can suffer through difficult moments only to say that, "At least I stuck with my guns and finished what I started". Yes, I always wonder what sort of person that will make me, when I am old and looking back on my life. For the record, The Hubs and I make sure our Little Darling finishes every single thing that she starts. We are both passionate about instilling that trait into our kiddo.
A prime example would be my issue with maintaining a fitness plan. I am healthy overall... I mean, I enjoy being active. I could totally stand to lose about 30-50lbs, but hey, who's counting?! I have never stuck with a specific regimen for more than 3-5 days. Making it to the 5 day mark warrants a "Happy Dance".
So my goal this morning was to walk 5 miles... Reasons why I lost motivation:
1. It was hot.....Super fucking hot. Each lap seemed to be double the distance and my vagina gut and "under titty" were seating profusely. I felt unattractive, and that matters when I am working out.
2. There was an unusual abundance of creeps walking about, some on bikes, some with dogs. My Little Darling was taking a break from walking laps. Although I could see her, I doubted that if a creep decided to abduct my one and only child that I would be able to catch that person, if I were too far away from her...... Ok. Maybe I am just crazy, and these were all nice, elderly people who were just taking a stroll from the assisted living program that's right next to my apartment complex. But still! I was on high alert.
3. Weird shit was falling from all trees. There are trees everywhere. I am highly allergic to all trees and the shit that falls from them, lives in them, IS them...whatever. Tree = Puffy eyes & Dermatitis.
4. I can't do simple math, so I thought 12 laps was 4 miles... And then reality hit, and I realized that, not only am I a lazy moron, but I can't count. Awesome.
5. My Little Darling decided to play behind a huge rock. I couldn't see her and she couldn't hear me screaming for her. I ran, which is, like, "Aw hell naw! Make it stop! The agony!" for anyone who witnessed. By the time I found her, or she found me, I collapsed to the ground in tears. My stomach was in my chest, my knee was to the point of giving out, my eyes were burning from pollen mixed with salty tears, and I was wheezing like someone with emphysema. All in all, I was fucking DONE.
So I held my kid nice and tight as we walked home, her little 60-pound body supporting my 200-pound, nearly 6 foot body all the way home. I have never been so terrified! While caught up in my emotions, I almost (for just the briefest of seconds) thought that I needed to have more children. I mean, what would I do if something happened to the ONLY ONE I have?!
So yea. I am a quitter. And I always have a great story to tell about why I started down one path, quit half way, and hopped on over to a new path.
Relevance??
I have a HUGE give away planned, but it's not complete. More on that some other day. I will tell you now, though, that my procrastination was medically induced!
As part of my procrastination, I have been eating lots of pastries:
Don't fret. I always accompany the pastry with coffee or tea...and a fruit or vegetable to balance things out. Today, it was blueberries.
And I have also been working on this "side project" for my daughter's room. Let me just PAUSE and say that I have been trying to remodel/redecorate her bedroom for over a year! Yes! It has been something like 18 months! I still haven't even painted a single wall. I need to get moving before she turns 18 and all my ideas are completely useless...
To my surprise, I am making lots of progress on this pillow cover. I am pretty shocked. I just don't do well with 5,000 small parts. But I haven't lost any. I have continued to work on it. And I have also started to assemble the hexies. I chose the random assembly rather than the one that fades from one color into another. I like random. It's fun.
I am a little less than half way done with enough hexies to cover a small pillow. I am REALLY excited about the progress I am making. I have never made a pillow cover before, so this is pretty special.
At this point, I just need to decide if I want to do hexies for the front and back or if I want to cover the back with fabric. I have some options below...
I haven't decided anything just yet. Honestly, I have no idea how attach crochet motifs to fabric. LOL. This is all one big learning process for me. For example: If I had known that stitching 500 thousand hexagons would take hours, I would have totally used a pattern or plan to connect them as I was going along. It's all good. You Live and you Learn.
If you are curious about the crochet hearts... I will tell you more about those on another day. I have a bunch of hearts made, using different patterns. I'll share them all with you as soon as I figure out what to do with them!
Finishing what I start has never been my strength. I was never forced to finish what I started when I was young, so I never found the value in it until I was an adult. Now, I always admire those who stay the course from start to finish. Those who had a plan and saw it all the way through. On the other hand, however, I have also accepted the fact that I am definitely a carefree individual. I just have to do what makes me happy, even if that changes from moment to moment. I am just not the kind of girl who can suffer through difficult moments only to say that, "At least I stuck with my guns and finished what I started". Yes, I always wonder what sort of person that will make me, when I am old and looking back on my life. For the record, The Hubs and I make sure our Little Darling finishes every single thing that she starts. We are both passionate about instilling that trait into our kiddo.
A prime example would be my issue with maintaining a fitness plan. I am healthy overall... I mean, I enjoy being active. I could totally stand to lose about 30-50lbs, but hey, who's counting?! I have never stuck with a specific regimen for more than 3-5 days. Making it to the 5 day mark warrants a "Happy Dance".
So my goal this morning was to walk 5 miles... Reasons why I lost motivation:
1. It was hot.....Super fucking hot. Each lap seemed to be double the distance and my vagina gut and "under titty" were seating profusely. I felt unattractive, and that matters when I am working out.
2. There was an unusual abundance of creeps walking about, some on bikes, some with dogs. My Little Darling was taking a break from walking laps. Although I could see her, I doubted that if a creep decided to abduct my one and only child that I would be able to catch that person, if I were too far away from her...... Ok. Maybe I am just crazy, and these were all nice, elderly people who were just taking a stroll from the assisted living program that's right next to my apartment complex. But still! I was on high alert.
3. Weird shit was falling from all trees. There are trees everywhere. I am highly allergic to all trees and the shit that falls from them, lives in them, IS them...whatever. Tree = Puffy eyes & Dermatitis.
4. I can't do simple math, so I thought 12 laps was 4 miles... And then reality hit, and I realized that, not only am I a lazy moron, but I can't count. Awesome.
5. My Little Darling decided to play behind a huge rock. I couldn't see her and she couldn't hear me screaming for her. I ran, which is, like, "Aw hell naw! Make it stop! The agony!" for anyone who witnessed. By the time I found her, or she found me, I collapsed to the ground in tears. My stomach was in my chest, my knee was to the point of giving out, my eyes were burning from pollen mixed with salty tears, and I was wheezing like someone with emphysema. All in all, I was fucking DONE.
So I held my kid nice and tight as we walked home, her little 60-pound body supporting my 200-pound, nearly 6 foot body all the way home. I have never been so terrified! While caught up in my emotions, I almost (for just the briefest of seconds) thought that I needed to have more children. I mean, what would I do if something happened to the ONLY ONE I have?!
So yea. I am a quitter. And I always have a great story to tell about why I started down one path, quit half way, and hopped on over to a new path.
Relevance??
I have a HUGE give away planned, but it's not complete. More on that some other day. I will tell you now, though, that my procrastination was medically induced!
As part of my procrastination, I have been eating lots of pastries:
Don't fret. I always accompany the pastry with coffee or tea...and a fruit or vegetable to balance things out. Today, it was blueberries.
And I have also been working on this "side project" for my daughter's room. Let me just PAUSE and say that I have been trying to remodel/redecorate her bedroom for over a year! Yes! It has been something like 18 months! I still haven't even painted a single wall. I need to get moving before she turns 18 and all my ideas are completely useless...
To my surprise, I am making lots of progress on this pillow cover. I am pretty shocked. I just don't do well with 5,000 small parts. But I haven't lost any. I have continued to work on it. And I have also started to assemble the hexies. I chose the random assembly rather than the one that fades from one color into another. I like random. It's fun.
I am a little less than half way done with enough hexies to cover a small pillow. I am REALLY excited about the progress I am making. I have never made a pillow cover before, so this is pretty special.
At this point, I just need to decide if I want to do hexies for the front and back or if I want to cover the back with fabric. I have some options below...
I haven't decided anything just yet. Honestly, I have no idea how attach crochet motifs to fabric. LOL. This is all one big learning process for me. For example: If I had known that stitching 500 thousand hexagons would take hours, I would have totally used a pattern or plan to connect them as I was going along. It's all good. You Live and you Learn.
If you are curious about the crochet hearts... I will tell you more about those on another day. I have a bunch of hearts made, using different patterns. I'll share them all with you as soon as I figure out what to do with them!
